How do you feel about Conflict? What do you think about conflict? Do you believe it is an important component of a healthy relationship? Or, do you think of it as a necessary evil, or do you avoid it like the plague?

Conflict is a normal and important aspect of human existence. We are not all alike nor do we want the same goals and desires. Therefore, there will be conflict in relationships. So, being afraid of conflict just adds another layer of stress and fear in our minds and bodies. Unless the person you engage in conflict with is a sociopath or a raging manic, conflict does not have to be that difficult or frightening.

There is a healthy way to “fight” that brings resolution and strengthens the relationship. Unresolved conflict causes great harm in the long run. It is the proverbial elephant in the middle of the room. But even if we ignore said Elephant, he is still pooping everyday.  So the unresolved issues grow larger and stronger. Whenever two people want different things there will be conflict. Because we are human we will rupture our relationships and conflict resolution is one of the ways we repair that rupture.

Today I will share 4 simple concepts to focus upon when you are preparing for conflict. Following these 4 steps will allow you to engage in conflict resolution from a more calm, grounded perspective and hopefully reduce some of the fear associated with disagreements and “fighting”.

For more information

Here is an article from Harvard on conflict resolution;

5 Conflict Resolution Strategies

Teaching orphans to engage their healthy “fight” response

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